If you think complicated, you can’t think big.

How I Defeated Indecision

I want to start a bit philosophical… What’s the worst kind of evil? Think about it. Maybe betrayal because it strikes at your weakest points without warning. But that can’t be it, because you can at least prepare. So, what is the worst kind of evil? I would say ignorance, incompetence, and indecision—forces against which there are no defenses.

Thus, let’s talk about decision-making.

I make decisions all the time. I started my first business at age 13, skipped 9th grade, and asked out the same girl four times. Now, at 16, I’m weeks away from finishing 12th grade, and I’ve learned some important lessons along the way. I am no seasoned tactician; nonetheless, I’ve tested and adopted many frames.

This text has three central takeaways.

  1. If you think complicated, you can’t think big. The doer always beats the thinker because. To cite Confusions: Life is simple, and we insist on making it complicated.
  2. You can’t overstate the monumental insignificance of almost everything. Most of your decisions don’t affect anything, and nearly everything you worry about will be irrelevant in a decade.
  3. There’s no perfect decision; stop hoping for one. You don’t have to be right every time, and you don’t have to wait for the perfect opportunity. Life is too short to do nothing. It’s better to make a mistake than to think when there’s nothing to think about except thoughts. If you make a mistake, at least you learn. Every decision carries risk and nothing is guaranteed. However, not making decisions always guarantees failure. You will never be ready; are you willing to take the leap of faith?

Let’s get started!

1. You can’t overstate the monumental insignificance of almost everything.

Some collapse on the dilemma of what to wear, while others marry a psychopath without a second thought. I like to assign priorities to decisions. After all, I want to allocate the correct amount of mental bandwidth; I don’t want to obsess over something trivial or make a big decision on impulse.

So, let me share five decision categories, starting with the bigger ones.

       a) Unofficial Category Zero

You could always decide to end your life. Alternatively, you could also choose to restart from scratch.

       b) Category One: Life changing

Consisting of three central questions, the first category is virtually irreversible.

Which God to follow? Your beliefs, community, relationships, and work - in short, life - will fundamentally differ if you follow Christ versus Marx.
Which wife to marry? This is the second most significant decision you will ever have to make because you will spend more time with this person than with any other. You will either magnify or dimmish each other.
How many children? I don’t need to explain how children will uproot your entire existence. In a broader context, choosing your legacy is a central life decision.

       c) Category Two: Serious

My mother, sister, and I moved to Germany when I was five. That move is theoretically reversible, but who am I fooling? Important decisions always require sacrifice. These decisions ought to be thought through and not made on impulse. Other serious decisions include buying a house, attending university, taking a job, or starting a business.

       d) Category Three: In the background

Compared to the second category, these decisions don’t require massive sacrifices but can nonetheless have a nearly unlimited upside. If any small project fails, no one sees anything, and I revert to my baseline - nothing. Even though a first date seems important, it isn’t, because nothing changes if it ends poorly. Skipping a grade, starting a blog, or signing up for the gym are small background decisions. There’s not much to think about; it’s all about doing.

       e) Category Four: Habits

Let’s move to the next category, your daily actions.

Most decisions in your day-to-day life don’t compound. They are irrelevant, especially when you zoom out. But habits are different. They only show their colossal power once you zoom out.

Whether you do some pushups or ‘treat’ yourself with sugar, very little changes – at least initially. But because changes are tiny, habits are frequently mistaken for trivial decisions, which we will discuss soon. That’s the trap. Habits compound; they teleport to mastery or kill with a thousand small cuts.

I use habits to stack correct decisions without thinking about them. For example, deciding what to eat once is trivial, but deciding what to eat a thousand times isn’t.

You repeat actions to build habits; you repeat habits to build routines. By adding structure, decision drag and confusion get reduced significantly. Going to bed on time is absolutely amazing. By doing so, you will stop oversleeping, and because you don’t party, you can avoid drunk driving, cheating, and being hungover. Also, having dedicated working and sleeping times helps you get to work and sleep better.

However, I must admit something about habits. Most self-improvement habits are pointless. Journaling, cold plunges, and affirmations can be nice, but they aren’t actions.

        f) Trivial

Now, let’s talk about the final category of decisions: the sand amongst the pebbles.

On a Wednesday evening, I got the idea to start this blog. By Thursday noon, I had written and published three texts. Notably, I never care about colors, fonts, or logos—these things are irrelevant. It is February, and the design hasn’t changed in eight months.

Whether you wear a brown or white sweater, nothing changes. Unless your car costs more than a house, no one will care. Going for a hike or on the beach also changes zero. Notably, your words to ask out your hot blonde are almost irrelevant.

I use speed to pierce through unremarkable decisions. It took precisely three seconds to decide which color I wanted my room to have – white.

I am so calm because God gave me the power to ignore; I shall use this power. I don’t waste my time trying to make the perfect irrelevant choice. Most people are so busy trying to find meaning in nothing that they forget to find meaning in something.

But no matter which decision you’re facing, remember, most of them are brutally insignificant in the face of death.

2. My spirit is willing, but my flesh is weak.

Before you make big decisions … Let me tell you something.

My first business failed a few months ago. Meanwhile, I was badly heartbroken. I also got sick. Three years into my self-improvement, I felt depressed at Christmas 2023.

What did I do while lying sick in bed? I wrote. Perhaps that’s the last thing I should have done because almost every conclusion was false – writing with a defeated mind is like going to the gym with a broken arm.

That’s how I learned never to make decisions when I'm hungry, thirsty, cold, hot, excited, tired, burnt out, depressed, or longing for hot blondes and cute brunettes.

Your more primal desires tint each decision, especially if they are strong. You can’t think about making tactical decisions when you think of food. Or here’s another example: Adam disobeyed God because he wanted Eve’s validation, and thus, paradise fell apart.

Don’t make decisions on impulse.

3. The cost of indecision

You’ve perhaps heard of opportunity cost, referring to tradeoffs every decision has. Yet, many people forget the cost of indecision. Every decision you consider takes up mental bandwidth, which caps your potential. Worries are notorious wastes of creativity, and stress is caused by indecision – knowing that you should have done something can’t be healthy. Indecision can kill.

4. Discovering yourself to make better decisions

This section is specifically designed to help you decide which career to pursue.

       1. Do nothing to clear your mind

What happens if you cast a coin into a puddle? The water splashes, and it turns muddy. If you hold still, the mud will settle, and the water will clear. Thus, you will easily spot the coin. That’s why we meditate. We want to purify our minds by adding stillness.

Revert to solitude and stillness to find direction. I want you to do nothing for two days. If I say nothing, I mean it. No phone, sweets, internet, music, books, people, or warm water… Lie in bed as if you were sick and stare at your ceiling. You shall only use a pen and a piece of paper.

It sounds extreme; well, it is. That’s the price most people aren’t willing to pay. Most people won’t dare to be alone with their thoughts. They fear the reality right before their eyes. After all, they may realize they had been living a false life all along—a life dictated by everyone but them, a life where they lived up to everyone and lost themselves by doing so.

Masculine essence is direction; you must cut out distractions to find direction.

Three months ago, after two days of stillness, I wrote 39.700 words in twenty days. I also used this method on several occasions, for example, to recover from my burnout. I gave myself time to process everything.

Two days is no massive sacrifice; time is going to pass anyway.

       2. Purify your thoughts

We removed distractions - now we shall restore the capacity to think. Sexual desire is the master of all desires. Hence, controlling it will significantly impact every area of your life. That's why many great inventors or other brilliant minds stayed celibate their entire lives.

Even though you would expect the opposite, by not touching yourself, your decisions will be tinted by an indomitable spirit – not one of shame, regret, and defeat. Controlling your sexual desire will make your world light up in color.

Controlling your sexual desire is fairly straightforward. Sit upright with your shoulders back and breathe deeply. Ever wondered why most people don’t do it? By breathing deeply, your sexual energy gets redistributed across your entire body. Spending time with friends or intentionally socializing around pretty women also helps. The most potent tip is prayer and having an icon to remind yourself that the Lord is watching.

       3. Reflect

I think we should make reflection cool. It’s just you and your pencil – floating through the cold infinity of time and space, bringing your soul to paper, all with the whisper of a candle.

What would I do if I had achieved everything? What would I do if I couldn’t fail? What would I do if no one was watching? What would I do if I felt no fear? What am I doing right now, what do I care about, and what do I want?

For a very long time, I was obsessed with building a software business, so I just did that. As of February 2024, I care about content creation, specifically writing and creating videos. And yes, that’s how I would spend my time if I had achieved it all.

If you don’t care about anything and have no talents, do not despair. I encourage you to try many things. If you don’t know where to start, talk to people. You don’t have to commit to everything you try; now is not forever.

When I was eleven, my mother made me take riding classes on a blonde horse. That’s a very random experience, and that’s the point. You learn by doing and by trying, not by lingering around distracted and stimulated.

I have another powerful frame: What’s the better story? You will never wish to have fewer crazy stories.

5. Which problem do you prefer?

Being a doctor brings status and money. But so does being an entrepreneur – at least, if you’re successful. In fact, any career has the potential to bring abundant status and money.

So, if the benefits are the same everywhere: Am I willing to handle the nasty parts?

I shouldn’t become a kindergartener because I don’t want to wipe kids’ asses for the rest of my life. I’m not bloodthirsty enough to become a doctor, nor do I want to breathe disinfectant all day. Likewise, I couldn’t become a lawyer or teacher because I value freedom. I also can’t be a philosopher or programmer because I refuse to die as a virgin.

Put the status and money aside and ask yourself: Can I enter a flow with my task?

For example, I couldn’t enter a flow while cutting bodies, filling out documents, or doing math on some electronic component.

It may take a few months until you’re skilled enough to enter a flow, but sometimes, it never happens. If a flow cannot be reached, and every second becomes draining. Generally speaking, if you do something you don’t care about, you will fail to enter a flow, even when you become skilled.

To find what you could enter a flow with, I encourage you to look at childhood, especially at the details. For example, I had a diary, and that’s essentially what I'm doing right now, but now, I'm a big boy, you see!

You can’t teach passion. You can’t choose who to fall in love with, and you cannot decide what you’re interested in. In the silent parts of your soul, there’s a power you can’t control; you may as well call it God.

If we consider other areas of life, such as dating, both principles remain. If you consistently fail to enter a flow with someone, spoiler, you’re incompatible. Similarly, something you admire can become something you despise, for character traits are good and bad.

- Someone meek and shy can be very irritating. At the same time, someone confident and assertive screams girl boss, and I'm not sure that’s desirable.
- A laid-back and relaxed person could prove unreliable and sluggish. Spontaneity can seem as stupid and reckless at times. Yet, I doubt I want a girl who’s focused and calculated. Being focused and calculated is a dangerous combination of traits.
- Passionate love, isn’t that everyone’s dream? Not so fast! Passion can also mean pointless drama, something I don’t find particularly hot.

According to my sister, I used to be very toxic because I never compromised on anything. That’s the price of being visionary and purposeful. A character without flaws would be pure light – and that’s reserved for God.

In short, focus on the problems. Every choice has – by definition – tradeoffs and sacrifices.

However, one shouldn’t underestimate one’s adaptability and resilience. Many pros and cons only exist on paper. Having lived in a metropolis and a village, the differences aren’t monumental—you simply replace the metro with a car.

6. What I am solving for?

One day, my sister had news for me.

🟦“I think you shouldn’t have skipped 9th grade. If you didn’t skip, you would be a year older and hence more mature. Also, you could have worked on your projects a year longer.”

🟨“You went to 9th grade. Did going it make you more mature?”

🟦“Well, it’s in the details, and I think yes.”

🟨“Were those details worth fifty thousand euros? - That’s the average yearly salary.”

🟦“Well, but you don’t have fifty thousand left at the end of a working year anyway.”

🟨“Were those details worth five thousand euros? If so, sell them and make five thousand euros.”

🟦“You know, I had to make a schedule all by myself, and I know you’d be too clumsy to do it.”

🟨“Correct, I tend to dismiss most things, and indeed, I am a bit clumsy. My biggest fear in life is leaving the stove on when I leave the house. But did 9th grade teach you how to manage? What’s better, sitting at school or learning in the real world? I believe skipping 9th grade while working on my projects taught me much more than lingering at school.”

I decimated my older sister’s arguments because her idea of maturity and wisdom was low-resolution. She lacked clarity; I didn’t, for my goals and desires were crystal clear. I knew very well what I desired: I wanted to demonstrate my capability and gather irrefutable evidence to cement my status. I found school boring and didn’t like my former classmates anyway, so there was nothing to lose. Moreover, school didn’t teach me how to build a business, and I didn’t see what school had to do with my purpose.

In short, success was the priority, not false wisdom.

I know what I want. I only care about women, health, money, power, and status. I also care about God, freedom, and enlightenment. That means I don’t watch movies, play video games, eat unhealthy food, or spend time on my phone. Those things don’t make me sexy, rich, healthy, powerful, or free.

I may sound smart while writing this text, but I'm not. Most of the things I did while working on my now failed business had nothing to do with getting customers, making them worth more, or increasing enterprise value. Because I didn’t have clarity, almost every decision I made was false.

Not knowing the goal is indistinguishable from living in a delusion. Being directionless is like trying to fix a leaking pipe with a bucket instead of turning the water off and replacing the pipe. You have to know the goal, priority, or problem. The clearer your perception, the better your decisions.

[This section was added many months later, but written from the original perspective]

7. I’m secretly a coward

“So, what’s your dream job?”

“Judging purely on my actions, it’s entrepreneur or ‘at least’ executive.”

“Yeah, you know I also like business, and let me give you a tip. You just need to find the right idea. By the way, I once had an idea, and maybe we could partner, and you give me half of what you make? My idea-”

If I got a dollar every time I had this conversation, I could feed myself for a week. Maybe I should become a therapist and get paid to listen to that nonsense.

They think that you could become a billionaire overnight if you find a bold solution to a problem we barely know exists. After all, the internet has infinite leverage, and many seemingly ridiculous ideas have become monumental.

But that’s a fallacy.

Let me explain. Suppose you have two machines: 50% for a million and 1% for a hundred million.

The second option, the big win, symbolizes the innovative startup; the first option is a bulletproof alternative. Option two, the big win, is better on paper because your average win is twice as much. In other words, the big win outweighs ninety-nine losses.

But now, let’s add a twist. The price to play is three years, meaning you get five shots. Let’s use our numbers. If you play the safe option five times, that’s fifteen years, your chances of remaining empty-handed are 3%. If you attempt the big win, there’s a 95% chance of being left with nothing. Suddenly, pursuing the big win is a stupid idea.

In most cases, by taking big risks, everyone profits—except you. Governments need taxes, people need jobs, and the world needs innovation.

At the same time, I believe in being bold. Someone too stupid to quit is often the one to win. To become truly outstanding, you must do what it takes. The bigger the dragon, the bigger the hero. In a world of infinite uncertainty, the only thing that matters is trying. Every challenge leads to growth, and even a failure can make for a epic story.

The core of this analogy stands firm: it’s safer to play small. But sometimes, playing small isn’t enough. Luckily, there’s a solution—the compound effect. You can stack countless small wins.

Greatness comes from doing a thousand things a notch better. Simplicity always beats complexity since it can scale. Doing the obvious thing often solves the bigger problem, and no amount of innovation can repair a broken foundation. If you think complicated, you can’t think big.

My favorite kind of risk is the one without a downside. It’s literally impossible to lose while writing, recording videos, reading, and programming. Since there’s no downside, I profit from a potentially infinite upside. I either win or learn.

8. Directional correctness

In a world of infinite uncertainty, there's no perfect decision; stop hoping for one. So it’s not about black or white, but rather, how black or white.

Let me tell you a story.

It was the summer of 2022; I had just turned 15 and I was one-half years into my entrepreneurial journey. I had learned how to program and started building my first app.

Even though I was already building my first business, I had a slight desire to return to science. After all, my earlier childhood was dominated by math, nuclear physics, and astronomy. I had a two-week internship at my local university.

After the internship, my entire reality collapsed. I discovered that I hated science and engineering and that my childhood was a mere façade, talked into existence by everyone but me. I cared about power and freedom, not data.

I had never worked harder before or since. After two months of brute force, my first app was online. That’s what I call motivation. Whatever I did, I knew I had to run away from the fate of becoming an engineer. It’s easier to move away from something than to move toward something.

At each point, some actions move forward while others move backward. Even if the steps forward are tiny, one should take them—one step at a time.

9. Break down and invert

I don’t know what a good relationship looks like. In fact, I know nothing about relationships.

Yet, if I wanted to ruin any relationship, I would know exactly what to do: I would avoid spending time, be disrespectful and ungrateful, never gift flowers, replace compliments with insults, and I would prioritize being abusive, manipulative, negative, and complacent.

Great, I know exactly what not to do. Now let me invert again. I must show respect and appreciation, give flowers and compliments, and be caring, straightforward, and purposeful.

While the road to success can seem blurry, the road to failure is straightforward. Humans are exceptional at detecting problems. Asking yourself how to fail quickly and then flipping the answer is magnitudes more effective than asking yourself how to succeed. Life is simple.



*****

February 8th, 2024

On a day in late January, I arrived at a mountain’s foot and failed to conquer it; it was getting too dark, and I underestimated the challenge.

I intended to retry in the winter holidays, but I decided I had nothing to wait for. Today is a snowy Thursday, and after a math exam, I took my sister's bike and rode there. Because I forgot the lock, I had to take my bike to the top. The weather was getting increasingly worse, and on the way home, the bike’s breaks stopped working, and it was darkening rather quickly. I returned fatigued and covered in snow after five hours.

Such is taking the initiative. I did not wait for anything; I just did.

The best time to start is now.